Bastien marries me only for duty. I reject him and leave for good by faking my death. Yet he goes crazy looking for me. He says he loves me when we meet again. No! I don't buy it. I can't let him steal my child! ** "She's not yours!" The front door was locked...
Chapter 1 Pregnancy And Rejection
Selena’s POV:
The steady woosh woosh of an ultrasound machine fills the small exam room.
A faint thumping noise joins the alien sounds of the equipment, and the doctor seated between my legs grins up at me, “And there’s the heartbeat.”
“That is, without a doubt, the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.” I whisper.
“I’m going to be a mother.” I breathe in blissful disbelief.
I can’t wait to tell Bastien.
It hadn’t taken me long to fall head over heels for Bastien.
I love Bastien because he is kind and gentle when he does not have to be; because he would sacrifice anything for the members of his pack. I love him because he is every bit as smart and funny as he is protective and brave, because he makes me feel like no one else ever has or ever will.
I'm a Volana wolf, a target of Evil. My blood can grant eternal life.
My father Garrick locked me up since I was 10, or should I say, my stepfather. I’ve learned his true color only too late. He was once affectionate to me when my mom was alive. Yet after mom was gone, he turned into a total monster. He's been dosing me with wolfsbane every day for 8 years. My wolf didn’t survive it.
No wolf. No mate. No hope.
Until three years ago, on a stormy night, when Garrick was beating me again and wanted to do the unimaginable things to me, I escaped from his dungeon and run into Bastien and his father Gabriel.
They took me in and offered me an asylum. Because my mom once saved Gabriel, he feels obliged to protect me. So He arranged his son to marry me.
As a man of honor, Bastien would do anything to fulfill his duty to the pack. So he offered me to be his contract mate, as a way to protect me. Broken and traumatized, without anywhere to go, I agreed.
I have to remind myself that Bastien had already found love when we met, with a woman who did not need constant comfort and coddling; a woman who was his equal.Her name is Arabella.
Apparently before I came along, Bastien had been planning on taking a she-wolf named Arabella Winters as his mate. It seems Gabriel's edict forced them to end their engagement, and I can't deny it makes sense. Being in love with someone else would certainly explain Bastien's distance. It’s no wonder that he’s always held me at arms length, never opening up, never letting me in.
I haven’t succeeded in making him love me, at least, not in the way I love him. Yet we’ve been so happy lately, happy enough that I decided to propose extending the contract on our anniversary.
I don’t want to be selfish, I don’t want Bastien to settle for me if I’m not truly what he wants – but if there’s a chance he could want me, I have to take it.
On my way home I stop to buy groceries, planning a special dinner for my announcement. I go all out, purchasing good wine even though I can’t drink it, as well as the best cuts of meat and the most decadent dessert I can find.
I eye the clock as I drive home, hoping I can beat Bastien there and sneak the goods upstairs. Though the Alpha’s family and their Betas all live in the pack house with a number of enforcers, official pack business occurs in the government building next door. Some smaller packs might be able to do everything from their central house, but the Novas outgrew the space centuries ago.
Bastien and I live in a private apartment on the top floor, giving us the option to gather and spend our days with the rest of the house or hole up on our own. Tonight is definitely a hole up kind of night.
I’ve been grinning like a fool ever since leaving the doctor’s office, I can’t recall ever feeling this light. I practiced sharing the news while I drove, cycling through a number of strategies before deciding to simply tell Bastien without games or pretense.
Butterflies flutter rapidly in my belly as I climb the stairs, my body thrumming with anticipation. I have to juggle the bags in my arms to reach the door handle, but eventually manage.
The ecstatic smile slips from my face the moment I walk in.
Bastien is already there, waiting for me. He’s sitting alone in the darkened living room, a tumbler of amber liquid clasped in his large fist and a severe frown dominating his handsome face.
I pull up short, eyeing him warily. His eyes glow silver, an unmistakable sign that his wolf is vying for control. I set down my bags and hesitantly approach my husband.
“Bastien?” I broach carefully. “Is everything alright?”
“Have a seat Selene.” The rich bass of his voice is rough and emotionless.
I do as he says, perching on the edge of the couch, my spine ramrod straight. I know all at once what’s coming. I can see my hopes and dreams crashing around me as if they were real, rather than figments of my imagination. Love letters and wedding rings, ultrasound photos and baby carriages, children’s toys and tiny shoes– all litter the ground at my feet.
I’m afraid to speak. I know there’s no changing Bastien’s mind once it’s been made, but some delusional part of my brain still imagines the inevitable outcome might change if I do or say the right thing.
His fathomless eyes hold me captive, staring through me as the silence drags on. It stretches for so long I have to fight the urge to squirm in my seat. Normally Bastien enjoys making me squirm, but this is different. This isn’t a wolf playing with his food, this is an apex predator going in for the kill.
Finally he speaks. “I know our anniversary isn’t until tomorrow,” He begins gravely, “but I can’t put this off any longer.”
If Garrick taught me one useful skill it was how to hide my feelings for the sake of my own self-preservation. Bastien would never weaponize my emotions the way Garrick had, but I don’t want him to know how badly this will hurt me, not when I already feel so foolish. I can’t believe how stupid I’ve been, how naive.
“Tomorrow I’m going to have my father put things in motion for our rejection ceremony.”
His phone begins ringing, and before I can even respond, he accepts the call and raises the device to his ear. "Hey Bella," He greets warmly, rising from the sofa and striding past me as if I'm completely invisible. I can hear the distant tinkle of feminine laughter on the other end of the line, He chuckles as he leaves the room, not waiting to see what I'll say or how I'll react to his announcement.
The coldness of his behavior cuts me to the core. I'd been prepared for bad news, but I never expected my husband to be so heartless. It's clear now what's happening, and as usual it seems I'm the last to know. Bastien is leaving me for Arabella, and the last thing he wants – other than me – is a baby born by a pathetic halfling.
Chapter 2 Bastien Is Drunk
10 Days Until the Rejection Ceremony
Selene’s POV
The spinning blades of the ceiling fan whirl over my head, their swift revolutions mesmerize my senses, distracting me from all the unwelcome thoughts in my head.
Today is my three year anniversary, but instead of champagne and gifts, I lay alone in my bed
My husband is going to reject me in ten days, and I can’t even be angry with him.
____________________
I’m still lying there when my phone rings.
Bastien’s name flashes across the screen, and I pause a moment before answering. There’s no reason to broadcast my desperation. “Hello?”
I do not hear my husband’s voice on the other end of the line. Instead a woman’s high, tinkling laugh filters through the receiver. “Oh Bastien you’re too much!”
I don’t recognize the voice, “Hello?” I try again, the call sounds very muffled. A pocket-dial perhaps?
“Bella, would you behave for once?” I know that voice – only too well.
“Only if you make me.” I can practically hear her eyelashes batting through the phone. Some of the static fades, her voice suddenly sounding very clear. “Mmm,” She moans, “You remember just how I like it.”
I stab my finger into the ‘end call’ button, cutting off the exchange before the nausea rising in my throat can overwhelm me.
Arabella Winters has returned to Elysium, and Bastien is spending our anniversary with her instead of me. The she-wolf disappeared after my mating ceremony, traveling around to other packs in search of adventure or a new beginning. But whatever Arabella had been looking for, she clearly hadn’t found. Perhaps because she already knew where it was, but it was simply out of reach.
Well, It won’t be out of reach for much longer.
As disgusted as I am by the phone call, I know I don’t really have a right to be angry with Bastien. Our marriage has always been one of convenience, and I don’t want to get in the way of his happiness. I wish he would wait until we are officially separated, but he’s given me everything. The least I can do is return the favor.
I don’t want to be an anchor chaining Bastien to the past when he deserves to forge his own future, but that’s exactly what I will become if I tell him about the baby.
He can’t know, not ever.
I will leave. I will be taking a piece of Bastien with me. I will have my baby
I slide my palm to my belly, resting it over the most precious secret I’ve ever held. I imagine this is how my mother must have felt when my father died – the similarities between our journeys do not escape me, but I’m determined not to continue on her path.
My mother was running for her life when she left the Calypso pack, she didn’t have any resources or plans, she was in such dire straits she could not turn down an offer for help, no matter from whom it came. That will not be my story.
When I leave Elysium I will be taking everything I possess with me, everything I need to start fresh. I will not need to indebt myself to a man in order to survive, and I will not marry no matter how much judgment I incur for being a single mother.
____________________
About an hour later my phone rings again. This time it’s Aiden and I answer immediately; Bastien’s Beta only ever calls me if something is wrong.
“Aiden?”
Raucous voices and distorted music fill my ears, soon followed by the Beta’s baritone. “Selene, I’m sorry to call you like this, but we have a bit of a situation: Bastien is plastered and apparently determined to give himself alcohol poisoning. We can’t get him to stop, and I don’t think he’ll listen to anyone but you. At least, I hope he’ll listen to you.”
“Where are you?”
“Loup Garou,” Aiden shouts over the deafening background noise.
“I’m on my way.” I know the bar, though I’ve never been inside. I’ve gotten used to being around people in controlled settings, but big crowds still frighten me.
I do some breathing exercises as I drive, focusing on keeping myself calm rather than pondering the undoubtedly unpleasant scene awaiting me. Some anniversary this is. It’s so late there’s not any traffic, so the trip only takes a few minutes.
I step out of the car, eyeing the neon bar sign and imposing doorway with great trepidation. Taking one final soothing breath, I enter the fray.
Three things jump immediately to my attention. First, Bastien is not the only one on a bender. The bar is in borderline chaos, so packed with wolves I think it must be a fire hazard. Second, Aiden is not Bastien’s only drinking buddy. Arabella stands close by his side, her body language making the nature of their relationship very clear. And finally, my husband is dangerously out of control.
I can feel his agitation from across the room, can read the barely concealed fury simmering closer and closer to its boiling point. There’s something else tangled up in his aura, something that seems strangely akin to despair.
I’ve seen Bastien like this before; if he drinks heavily enough his demons emerge to torment him. I’ve never known what happened in his past to inflict such agony, but it’s always unbearable to watch.
I don't really want to move deeper into the malay. I would prefer to stay near an exit, I do not like the idea of not having a viable escape route.
I give myself a little shake and stride through the crowd, appreciating how naturally it parts for me. Though no one bothers pretending they are not watching the unfolding scene with avid interest, the bar patrons do me the courtesy of staying in place even after I pass, leaving a wide path to the door.
The commotion pulls Bastien’s attention from Arabella. It takes him a second to process my appearance, but the vivid flash of emotion in his eyes broadcasts his surprise once he does. My presence seems to sober him slightly, some of the manic energy he’d been exuding ebbing away.
He pulls up to his full, imposing height and prowls forward, sweeping his gaze across the crowd as he closes the distance between us. If I didn’t know any better I’d think he’s scanning the room for threats, but that doesn’t make any sense. We’re on home turf among trusted pack members. No, he must be trying to figure out who snitched.
Bastien creates a sort of cage with his arms when he reaches me, wrapping his large body around me protectively. “What are you doing here?”
I don’t know what to make of his apparent paranoia, but I have to admit I feel infinitely calmer than I did a second ago. I’m also deeply relieved to find he is not angry or put out by my arrival. “I came to take you home.”
Hard eyes bore into me for a long moment, “You could have called, I would have met you in the parking lot.”
Ah. So perhaps he is irritated after all. Bastien isn’t one for public scenes, and it occurs to me that he’s probably especially opposed to creating one in front of Arabella. “You’ll come, then?” I ask nervously.
Bastien responds instantly, “Of course.”
______________
By the time we get home Bastien is all but passed out. I circle around to the passenger seat and undo his seatbelt, shaking him gently. “Bastien. Wake up, we’re home.”
He rouses at the sound of my voice, blinking at me dazedly.
“Come on, big bad wolf.” I tease, “Let’s get you to bed.”
Flames ignite in his eyes. “Is that an invitation?”
Chapter 3 Lust
Selene’s POV
A stab of pain pierces my heart. The man has no idea what I would give for one last night with him. Unfortunately I don’t think he’s in any state to make good on the offer. “I meant your bed.” I finally answer, “But I’ll tell you what: If you can get yourself up and into the house, I’ll invite you to do whatever you want with me, wherever you want.”
Before I realize what’s happening I’m upside down, with Bastien’s shoulder digging into my stomach. He carts me into the house like a sack of potatoes, navigating to his bedroom and tossing me onto the bed. I yelp with surprise, then shiver with anticipation as a very large, very aroused wolf bears down on me.
I stare up at Bastien with wide eyes, my heart racing in my chest, so loud I’m sure he can hear it.
Flames dance up my cheeks, and I know I must be bright red. Lust, excitement and fear war for control of my body, swirling around each other in an intoxicating tempest.
Bastien lowers himself to the bed, leaning over my prone form and pinning my hands against the mattress on either side of my head. He swallows my startled gasp, his mouth claiming mine before another word can be spoken.
As tense as I was moments before, I immediately let go when Bastien takes control, going soft and supple as he extracts kiss after kiss from my lips. I open myself to him, giving my body up for his conquest and letting him sweep me away from reality. I lose all sense of my surroundings, the ecstasy of Bastien’s kiss barring all sound, all thought, all sensation not of him.
Bastien has kissed me thousands of times and made love to me in every way possible, but I’ve never felt such desperation to make us one. I am painfully aware that this kiss will be our last, that we are running on stolen time.
I want to drag this out as long as possible. I know the moment we stop, it will all be over –for good. I want to brand his lips into my skin; I want to scorch the image of him, powerful and fierce above me, into my memory; I want to make it so I can never forget how perfect this moment feels.
His teeth and tongue assail me, melding pain and pleasure until I'm gasping and moaning in his arms. I arch my back, straining toward his body in a feverish attempt to find relief for my sensitive flesh.
I know he’ll give me the relief I need eventually, but it won’t be soon enough. Bastien knows my body better than his own, and he revels in taking me to the very limits of pleasure. He works me over until my body is no longer my own, until my very existence has been reduced to a throbbing, searing ache that only he can ease.
When he doesn’t relent, I slump back down with a frustrated whine, and Bastien all but purrs with satisfaction. “Greedy little wolf.” He chuckles, dragging my lips from mine. He lays a trail of kisses over my jaw and down the slender column of my throat, eventually moving up to the soft spot behind my ear where he continues his torment.
The next thing I know he’s laving the tender flesh where my neck meets my shoulder, tasting me. I can’t take it anymore. “Please, Bastien, I want to touch you.” I squirm, trying to break his hold on my wrists.
He takes my mouth again, delving his tongue between my lips to tangle deliriously with my own. Bastien finally settles between my legs, fusing every inch of his body to mine. I writhe beneath him with delicious friction and he loosens his commanding grip, freeing my wrists. I bury my hands in his hair, nipping at his lower lip with my teeth.
He growls throatily, pulling back only far enough to meet my eyes. Flames engulf Bastien’s intense gaze, and I’m at a loss to determine whether he is sad or angry. “We were fated.” He declares, “We were mates but we never got to be together, not really.”
I freeze.
It suddenly feels as if all the air has been let out of the room. I push at Bastien’s shoulders until he rolls off me. There it is, the truth I’ve always known but he’s never spoken. Arabella is Bastien’s mate, and I took him from her. He sacrificed his destiny to do what he considered right, to help me when I was too lost and damaged to help myself.
I sit up slowly and glancing at Bastien over my shoulder. He’s laying on his back, looking at me with such pain and regret I feel sure he didn’t mean to reveal that secret. Or perhaps he regrets caving to drunken lust when he’s finally free to be with his mate.
“I’m sorry.” My voice is thick with emotion, and I get to my feet before he can notice and catch me. By the time I get to the door Bastien is half-asleep. I can’t recall ever seeing him so drunk.
________________
9 Days Until the Rejection Ceremony
I wake in the morning with a pounding head and sour stomach, despite the fact that Bastien is supposed to be the one with the hangover. I barely make it to the toilet when I remember the baby. Welcome to morning sickness. I think grimly.
I curl up against the wall, waiting for the intermittent bouts of nausea to pass.
A bright blue text message lights up the screen. Selene, this is Arabella. Do you think it might be possible for us to meet?
