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Chapter 1 — I Will Not Regret It

The heat from the man's body surrounded her slowly from behind as the moisture in his breath came closer to her ear when he whispered, “Is this your first time?”
The unfamiliar atmosphere near her ear sent a chill down her spine, yet she dared not make any sound.
Lin Xinyan could feel the man paused for a bit, then came the man's voice again, “There is still time to say no.”
She nervously clenched her hands, shook her head, and said “I will not regret it.....”
She was 18 years old. This was supposed to be the most wonderful years in her youth but yet.....
It hurts!
The excruciating pain made her trembled in the man's arms.
Keeping the only dignity left for herself, Lin Xinyan bit her lips and stayed quiet the whole time. This was her first sexual experience. She was nervous and fearful of the man. At the same time, she could feel his muscular body with unbelievable strength.
He didn't seem to tire out and kept conquering her body, fulfilling his lust in this long and miserable night.
After he was done, the man got up and entered the bathroom. Lin Xinyan rose from the bed exhausted; she put on her clothes and left the room.
In the hotel lobby, stood the middle-aged women who sealed the deal for her. When she saw Lin Xinyan coming out, she passed her a black plastic bag and whispered, “This is your reward.”
Lin Xinyan took the bag without hesitation and hurried out of the hotel with the money. She rushed to the hospital in the shortest possible time and paid no attention to the pain in her abdomen.
The corridor was quiet before daybreak. Two stretchers laid waiting before the operation theatre. They were blocked for they hadn’t make the payment yet.
When Lin Xinyan saw that, she was devastated and started sobbing, “I have money, I have the money! Please save my mother and brother......” While sobbing, she quickly handed the money to the doctor. Then the doctor had the nurse counted the money and ordered the staff to push her mother into the operating to prepare for surgery.
Seeing that her brother was not being pushed into the operating theater, Lin Xinyan begged the doctor, “Please save my brother as well.”
“I'm sorry. It is too late. There is nothing we can do now.” The doctor answered with a heavy heart.
Too late?
The truth hit Lin Xinyan like a heavy club shattering all of her hopes brutally.
The pain was so unbearable that it felt like she was stabbed on the chest with a knife while the cramps and spasms made her weak and she was unable to stand on her feet. Eight years ago, when she was ten, her father had an affair and left her and her pregnant mother. He had them sent overseas to a place that was completely strange to them.
After that, her brother was born. He was diagnosed with autism when he was three years old. This brought more hardships to their already tight financial situation. She and her mother worked many part-time jobs to get by. When the accident struck suddenly, she felt complete hopelessness as she had no relatives, no money nor the support of this cold and ruthless society.
As the last resort, she sold herself. Yet, she was not able to bring her brother back to life.
She felt miserable but she had not lost herself just yet. Life was very cruel but she had to take it with a smile for she had her mother to take care of.
Her mother needed her.
After the treatment, her mother was slowly recovering. But, she was completely heartbroken after knowing that her son had passed away.
Lin Xinyan cried as she hugged her and said, “Mom, I'm right here. Please be tough and continue to live on.”
For one month in the hospital, Zhuang Zijin always sat by the bed and was in a daze all day. Lin Xinyan knew that she was missing her brother. If it was not for her, her mother would have died along with her brother. She was expelled from school as for her long absence as she had to take care of her mother. Luckily, her mother was getting better by the day.
The woman brought some food to the hospital. Just when she was about to open the door into the ward, she heard some voice from inside.
It sounded familiar to her. Even though it had been eight years, she could still remember the look on his father's face when he forced her mother into a divorce.
He never came to see them even once after bringing them here; his sudden appearance today baffled them.
“Zijin, you were once very close to the madam from the Zong family and you agreed to an arranged marriage. According to the promise, your daughter should marry a member of the Zong family.”
“What do you mean, Lin Guoan?!” Zhuang Zijin wanted to beat him up so badly with her weak body that was yet to fully recover from the injuries. How inhumane he was to do this to her!
He never cared about them after moving them to this god forsaken place. And now he was here to take her daughter back to have her marry the Madam's son.
“Young Master Zhishen is your best friend's son. He is good-looking and his family is very well off. If she marries into the family, she would surely be having a much easier life there”. He softened his voice as he spoke.
Young Master Zhishen was virtuous and good-looking. But one month ago, he was bitten by a poisonous snake when he was on a business trip overseas. That accident paralyzed his nervous system, leaving him disabled and impotent.
Once married, she would not be happy there.
“I will marry him.”
Lin Xinyan opened the door and said, “I will marry him but on one condition.”
Lin Guoan was stunned when he saw Lin Xinyan. She was only ten when he last saw her. Now she had grown up with a fair and beautiful skin, yet she looked seriously skinny and physically underdeveloped.
He had another adorable daughter in the family.
She wasn't beautiful though. With that look, it would still be reasonable for her to marry an impotent person.
That made Lin Guoan feel better. He then asked, “What are your terms?”
“I want to go home with my mother and you need return everything that is rightfully hers. Only then will I marry him.” Said Lin Xinyan slowly as she calmed down.
Although she was not in her home country, she had heard so much about the Zong family's great successes and remarkable wealth when she was little. Lin Xinyan thought that the offer was too good to be true because Young Master Zhisen could be a man who was very ugly with birth defects.
Even so, this was a good opportunity for her to go home. With that, she could claim her mother’s dowry she brought with her when she married her father.
“Yan Yan...” Zhuang Zijin tried to advise her because a marriage was a serious matter. After all the hardships they went through, she did not want her daughter to risk marrying the wrong person.
Worried that Lin Xinyan could be persuaded by Zhuang Zijin to turn down the marriage proposal, Lin Guoan quickly said, “Alright, you can go home as long as you promise to marry him.”
“What about my mother's dowry?” Lin Xinyan asked him with an emotionless tone.
When Zhuang Zijin married Lin Guoan, she brought with her a considerable amount of dowry. It would be very difficult for him to give it back.
“Dad, I suppose my younger sister is very pretty. Therefore, she deserves a better life. She would be doomed if she marries an impotent man. Furthermore, you and my mother are divorced. Which means you should return everything she brought into the family.”
Lin Guoan looked away from her diffidently.
How did she know that Young Master Zhishen was impotent when she had been living overseas all these years?
Lin Guoan did not know that Lin Xinyan was just assuming.
The man then reluctantly said, “I'll give it back to you once you marry him.”
With her pretty look, why would his younger daughter marry an impotent man?
Being impotent was no different from being useless regardless how distinguished the man was.
Thinking about that gave Lin Guoan a sense of relief.
But now he hated Lin Xinyan even more for ripping him off.
Lin Guoan smirked at the young woman and barked, “How rude of you! I see your mother has not been educating you properly!”
Lin Xinyan thought that it should have been his responsibility also. He left her here and had not cared about her since.
However she knew she mustn't say that because she had no bargaining chip over him. Annoying Lin Guoan would not be a wise move.
“Get ready, we are leaving tomorrow.” Lin Guoan then threw his arms out of his vest and walked out of the ward.

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Chapter 2 — Getting Pregnant

“Yan Yan, getting married is a lifetime decision. I will not let you marry him.” Zhuang Zijin knew why Lin Xinyan wanted to do that.
Lin Xinyan put down the food on the cabinet beside the bed and said, “I'm not marrying an outsider anyway. Isn't he your friend's son?”
“She passed away many years ago. I don't know her son at all. You should marry the man you really like, even if it means to break the promise. You should not use as marriage as your bargaining chip. I would rather stay here for the rest of my life.”
The one she likes?
Even if she meets one, she would not be worthy of that.
It wasn’t important to her who she would be marrying. What really mattered was taking back everything they took away from her mother.
Zhuang Zijin didn't manage to convince Lin Xinyan to change her mind. They went back to the home country the very next day.
Lin Guoan didn't let them in the family home of the Lins because he disliked them. Instead, he had them lived in a rent house. When the day came, Lin Xinyan would have to go to the Lins.
Lin Xinyan never wanted to go there because her mother would need to face the woman who destroyed her marriage. Therefore, they would rather stay here.
It was quiet.
Zhuang Zijin was still worried, and she said, “Yan Yan, the opportunity would not come to you if this is a good marriage arrangement. Not even if Madam Zong and I were close.
Lin Xinyan didn't really want to talk about it so she tried to change the topic by saying, “Mom, just eat your food.”
Zhuang Zijin sighed; she knew that Lin Xinyan didn't want to continue the topic. Lin Xinyan had suffered with her all these years and now she even had to sacrifice her marriage.
Although Lin Xinyan was holding the chopsticks, her appetite was spoiled due to morning sickness.
“Are you alright?” Zhuang Zijin was concerned about her.
Lin Xin Yan didn't want to worry her so she lied saying that it was jetlag.
She put down the chopsticks and entered her room.
After closing the door, she leaned on it. Although she had never been pregnant before, she had seen the symptoms when Zhuang Zijin was pregnant. Her mother was sickened with the smell of food and lost all her appetite.
And now, she had the same symptom.
It had been over one month since that night; her period had been late by more than 10 days.
She didn't want to think of the humiliation she endured that night. If it was not for her mother and her brother's sake, she would not have sold herself.
She started trembling......
“You are six weeks pregnant.”
Even after leaving the hospital, those words from the doctor kept repeating in her mind.
That was the result from Lin Xinyan checkup at the hospital without Zhuang Zijin's knowledge. She was worried and did not know whether she should keep the baby or have an abortion.
She could not help but caress her tummy. Although it was both an accident and a humiliation, she was somehow unwilling to have her baby removed.
It brought her both the joy and the excitement of being a first-time mother.
She sat quietly for a long, long while.
When she reached home, she hid the ultrasonography report before opening the door.
However, Lin Guoan was also there. Her expression turned grim immediately.
Why was he here?
From the look on Lin Guoan's face, he was not in a good mood because he had been waiting for her for some time. He then said without emotion, “Change your clothes.”
Lin Xinyan asked “Why?”
“Since you are going to marry into the Zhong family, you and the Young Master Zhishen are going to meet. Are you going to meet him looking like this? Do you want to embarrass me again?”
What was the feeling that came with pain?
She thought she would be numb after selling herself and losing her brother.
Yet the heartless words from Lin Guoan still caused her pain.
He had never cared for her since he sent her and her mother to a poor western country.
Where would she get money from?
If she had the money, her brother would not need to die because of a delay in treatment.
She clenched her fists.
Lin Guoan seemed to have noticed that. His looked a little awkward and said, “Let's go, the Zong family should be there already. Don't make them wait for too long.”
“Yan Yan......” Zhuang Zijin was worried and still tried to convince Lin Xinyan. She had lost her son and now she just wanted to take good care of her daughter. Wealth was not important anymore.
She would not want her daughter to go near the Lins nor the Zong family.
As everything in rich families could be complicated. What more, they did not know the character of the young master yet.
Her mother was worried.
“Mom.” Lin Xinyan gave her the comforting look to give her a sense of relief.
“Hurry up.” The man was afraid that Lin Xinyan would change her mind and he urged her hurriedly, grabbing her by the arm.
Lin Guoan did not like her and in return Lin Xinyan had no affection for her father as well.
Their bond as a family had completely vanished in this eight years of separation.
Unwilling to bring Lin Xinyan to meet the Zong family with her poor appearance, Lin Guoan brought her to a boutique and bought her some decent clothes.
Once they got inside the store, a shop assistant welcomed them. Lin Guoan pushed Lin Xinyan forward and said, “Recommend some clothes for her.”
The shop assistant glanced at her and estimated her size as she said, “Please come with me.”
The shop assistant then brought her a light blue dress and said, “Please try this on in the fitting room.”
Lin Xinyan took the dress and walked to the direction she pointed.
“Hao, must you marry the Lins?” The woman's voice was laced with grief.
Lin Xinyan turned her head towards the room next door when she heard voices coming from it. She peeked through the gap and saw a woman circling her arms around a man's neck, and said shyly, “Don't marry another woman, alright?”
Zong Jinghao looked at the woman with the slightest interest. He had no control in this matter. This was a marriage arranged by his mother and he could not turn his back on it.
And yet when he thought of that very night, he felt that he could not bear to disappoint her. “Was it very painful on that night?”
About a month ago, he had gone abroad to a developing country for a project. He was bitten by a poisonous snake and would have died if he did not go to bed with a woman as that was the only way out.
It was Bai Zhuwei who gave herself to him as an antidote.
And he knew how out of control he was at that time.
It had been said that it could be painful for a woman doing it the first time but he never showed her any mercy. Now that he thought about it, it must have been rather painful for her?
Yet she endured the pain quietly. All she did was trembling in his arms.
He knew Bai Zhuwei was interested in him from the beginning but he never gave her a chance.
One of the reasons was he had no affection for her and there was an arranged marriage made by his mother.
Yet she had always stood by him quietly. After that incident, he felt it was only right for him to give her a place she deserved.
Even until now, he could remember that striking crimson on the sheet.
Lying on his chest, Bai Zhuwei hummed softly.
She had always been in love with Zong Jinghao. She found a way to stay by his side as his secretary. She could not let him find out that she was no longer a virgin as she knew how seriously a man would take a woman's virginity. And so, she paid a local a handsome amount of money to send a virgin to take her place that night.
And when the girl left, she entered the room and made it look like it was her all along.
“If you like the clothes from this store, you can buy more.” Zong Jinghao said lovingly as he patted the top of her head.
“That room is reserved only for VIPs. Turn right for your room.” The shop assistant reminded Lin Xinyan.
In all luxury boutiques, every fitting room was an individual space. For the VIPs, these fitting rooms were even more extravagant. There was a space inside for fitting and the section outside was a lounge for accompanying guests to rest.
“Oh.” Lin Xinyan walked towards the room on the right.
As she changed in the fitting room, she thought about the couple. If she had not heard wrongly, she had overheard them talking about The Lins.
Perhaps the man was—

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Chapter 3 — I Should Marry You

After putting on her clothes, she took a peek to the left as she walked out of her fitting room. However, the door was now closed.
“It fits you perfectly.”
The shop assistant had good fashion sense and could dress someone up with almost no effort. Lin Xinyan was wearing a long light blue dress which made her skin looked even fairer. The ribbon by her waist insinuated her figure. Although she looked a little skinny, her delicate facial features made up for it.
Lin Guoan looked at her for another time and went to the cashier when he was satisfied. It was only then did he realize that the dress was 30,000! However, seeing that this was the dress she would be wearing to meet the Zongs, he paid somehow. “Let's go.” He said coldly.
Lin Xinyan was used to this attitude of indifference but the coldness in his tone still gave her a wave of sorrow.
She followed him into the car with her head lowered.
In a blink of an eye, the car stopped in front of the Lin’s villa.
The driver opened the door for Lin Guoan and Lin Xinyan walked after him.
For a few second, she stood still in front of the villa. Her father and his mistress had been enjoying the time of their life here while she and her mother were living a miserable life taking care of her ill younger brother.
She clenched her fists unconsciously.
“What are you doing there?” Lin Guoan looked back when he realized that there were no signs of her. He took a quick glance and saw that she was still standing by the entrance.
Lin Xinyan came out from her thought and caught up with him. When they arrived, the maids told them that the Zongs had yet to arrive so Lin Guoan told her to wait in the living room.
Near the French windows was a Seidl & Sohn piano made in Germany. It was an expensive gift from her mother when she was five.
She loved it since young. She had started learning to play the piano since she was four-and-a-half-year-old but stopped when she was sent away. She had not touched the piano since then.
Without realizing it, she reached for the piano. It was a familiar presence that excited her.
Her thumb gently pressed onto the keyboard. Plink. A clean sound rang in the room. Her fingers were stiff from the lack of practice.
“That's mine! Who gave you the permission to touch it?” A clear voice came from behind her and it sounded angry.
Her piano?
Lin Xinyan turned around and saw Lin Yuhan standing behind her. Lin Xinyan could almost see the steam coming out from the other girl's ears. Lin Yuhan was now seventeen; she was younger than Lin Xinyan by a year. Lin Xinyan could see that Lin Yuhan took after Shen Xiuqing's genes as she was beautiful.
She felt angry that she was gritted her teeth and stared at her.
“Yours?”
They destroyed her mother's marriage and took the money. And now even her mother's gift to her belonged to Lin Xinyan?
She clenched her fists and told herself to calm down. She did not have the power to claim the things that belonged to her yet.
She could not afford to be act recklessly now!
She was no longer the little crybaby who was sent away from her father eight years ago. She had grown up.
“You're Lin Xinyan!” It was now that Lin Yuhan realized that today was the day the Zongs were coming and her father had brought the mother and the daughter back from overseas.
Lin Yuhan could still remember the pitiful look on Lin Xinyan's face on the day when Lin Guoan sent Lin Xinyan and her mother out of the country. Lin Xinyan knelt down and begged her father not to send her away.
“Weren’t you happy that dad went to pick you up?” Lin Yuhan crossed her arms and looked at her in disdain. She said, “Don't be so happy. You're back just to marry into the Zongs. I heard that man—”
Halfway through her sentence, Lin Yuhan started sneering.
She couldn't help but felt gleeful when she thought about Lin Xinyan marrying an infertile, handicapped man.
Marriage was one of the major events in life. It would ruin Lin Xinyan's life if she were to marry a man like that.
Lin Xinyan frowned.
And at this moment, the maid came over and told them, “The Zongs are here.”
Lin Guoan went to the door and invited them into the house.
The instant that Lin Xinyan turned around, she could see the man being wheeled in. He had strong facial features and looked dignified. Despite being in a wheelchair, she doubted that anyone would ever look down on him.
His face... wasn't this the man she saw in the fitting room?
He is Young Master Zong?
Yet back at the fitting room, she saw clearly that he could stand and hug the woman! She saw nothing wrong with his legs then.
What was going on?
Before she could find out why the man was pretending to be handicapped, Lin Guoan called her over. “Xinyan, come here quickly. This is Young Master Zong.”
Lin Guoan had a look of reverence on his face then he bowed and smile. “Young Master Zong, this is Yan.”
A wave of sympathy rose in Lin Guoan's heart. He was the young master of the Zongs but he was now nothing but a handicapped.
Zong Jinghao's gaze fell onto Lin Xinyan. She looked quite young and skinny. He frowned as she was so skinny as if she was malnourished.
This was the marriage his mother had arranged for him. As her surviving son, he could not break the promise. That was why when he was bitten by a snake, he made sure the news about him never recovering from the poison spread like wildfire. Now everyone believed that he was handicapped and impotent. That was his plan to make the Lins back out of the engagement instead.
However, he had miscalculated. The Lins never did back out of it.
Zong Jinghao remained silent with a gloomy face and Lin Guoan thought he was not happy with his daughter. He explained quickly, “She's only eighteen and still young. She'll be a beauty when she grows older.”
Zong Jinghao sneered in his heart. He could not see any beauty. Instead, he saw the abnormality for a father to eagerly marry off his daughter to him, a “handicapped”.
He had sharp features but it looked more like a smirk when he smiled. “I had a serious injury when I was abroad so I won't be able to walk nor fulfil the duties of a husband—”
“I don't mind.” Lin Xinyan responded instantly.
Lin Guoan had promised her that as long as she married into the Zongs, he would return her mother's dowry to her. Even if she were to marry into the family for only one day and was divorced the next day, she would still agree to the marriage.
After taking a moment to digest the information, Lin Xinyan had finally realized what was going on. He could stand but came here to the Lins in a wheelchair instead. That meant that he was not keen on keeping this engagement because of that woman but he was hoping for the Lins to break the engagement.
What he had not considered was that Lin Guoan was willing to sacrifice unworthy daughter to fulfil the promise.
Zong Jinghao watched her with his eyes half-closed.
Lin Xinyan felt a shiver running down her spine when she noticed he was watching her. She too was reluctant and did not want to marry into the Zongs.
Yet if she did not, she would not be able to come back here and claim what was rightfully hers?
She lifted the corner of her lips and gave a bitter smile, “We were engaged since young. I should still marry you regardless of what you are now.”
The look on Zong Jinghao's face became even gloomier. This woman was good with her words.
On the other hand, Lin Guoan was aloof and didn’t pay much attention. He asked, “The wedding date...”
There was an expression of mixed emotions on Zong Jinghao's face before he settled into a calm look. “Of course we'll stick to the promise. This is an oath and I wouldn't back out on it.”
Lin Xinyan looked down and put her emotions aside. She dared not looked at him as he was clearly unhappy about the arrangement.
She was merely fulfilling the promise.
“That'll be good.” Lin Guoan was joyous. To be able to marry a plain daughter into the Zongs was something to jump at.
Although the Lins were also rich, they were nowhere compared to the Zongs. If the Zongs were a shark, the Lins were only shrimps.
There was no comparison.
Lin Guoan said as he bowed, “I have told the maids to prepare dinner. Please stay and have dinner with us.”
Zong Jinghao frowned as he was disgusted by Lin Guoan's two-faced attitude.
“I don’t think so. I still have some matters to settle.” Zong Jinghao rejected. On the way out, he went past Lin Xinyan. Zong Jinghao raised his hands to signal to Guan Jing for a pause. He raised his head and asked, “Would Miss Lin be free?”

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